Who said vibrators were just for vaginas? The human body is packed with thousands of erogenous zones, which all deserve your undivided attention. Thanks to open minds (and legs) more people have warmed up to the idea of backdoor play. In fact, 35% of women have admitted to having anal sex. Here’s an even sexier statistic - the same can be said for 40% of men! And no, we don’t mean gay men. 40% of straight men have engaged in anal sex with a partner of the opposite sex (did someone say pegging?) Another 80% of gay men have also dabbled in backdoor penetration. So what’s all the fuss about?
The main reason anal sex is so enjoyable for men is thanks to a little something called the prostate gland (or P-spot for short). This walnut-size gland is the gateway to unmatched pleasure and explosive, prolonged orgasms. Have we piqued your interest? Whether you’ve never experimented with anal play or you’re ready to kick things up a notch, we’re here to discuss everything from finding your prostate to massaging it and even choosing and using a prostate vibrator.
So, bend over, and let’s get started!
What is the Prostate and Where Is It?
Similar to the female G-spot, you may have heard of the prostate gland but don’t know exactly what or where it is. Let’s clear things up for you. The prostate is a sex gland located about 2 inches inside the male rectum between the bladder and the penis. This gland is responsible for producing part of male semen, but what really makes it magical is what happens when you stimulate it. Not only can men achieve more intense orgasms but they’re said to come in waves and produce large amounts of cum. Yes, please! Another added bonus is that prostate milking (the process of stimulating and draining your prostate) actually benefits your health (more on this later).
How Do I Stimulate My Prostate?
Now that you’re intrigued about all the wonders that your P-spot offers that’s talk about prostate stimulators. Fingers and toys are the most popular choice. You might wanna start with one or two fingers until you get a feel (literally) for where the P-spot is located and how to massage it just right. Once you’ve mastered prostate stimulation digitally, you can graduate to some pretty impressive vibrating prostate toys. While vibrating dildos work, prostate massagers are designed specifically with the male anatomy in mind. They’re shaped to fit every curve and sit snuggling inside your anal canal for constant, targeted pressure and pleasure.
Before you get started, do whatever it is you do to get yourself worked up. A nice hot shower, watching a few porn clips, or tickling and teasing your erogenous zones are all perfect techniques. Once you’re totally relaxed and aroused, lay in a comfortable position. We suggest on your side in a fetal position or on your back with your knees bent and legs spread, but you do what works for you. You’ll need plenty of lube and deep breathing. If you’ve experienced anal penetration in the past, this sensation won’t be new to you. For those who are new to the world of anal play and penetration, it might take you a few tries to get comfortable with the process. Generously lube up two fingers and slowly ease them into your bum. Once they’re about halfway inside your body, start pressing upward toward your pelvis. With a little exploring (don’t be too aggressive) you should land on your P-spot. It’s shaped like a walnut and somewhat rigid in texture. You’ll know it when you touch it. The feeling is different than anything you’ve ever felt before and often described as pleasurable but unusual.
Time for Toys
When you’re plenty comfortable with your fingers, it’s time to graduate to toys. Vibrating prostate massagers and prostate stimulators are especially useful for prostate stimulation thanks to their ergonomic design. Some vibrate, some don’t, but all of these massagers are curved to target this hard-to-reach area. So, what’s the difference? Vibrating prostate massagers let you control the patterns, intensity, and level of stimulation. Manual massagers, on the other hand (literally), require you to do the work. You need to move your body, rock back and forth or maneuver the toy in and out to achieve the direct control and pressure you’re after. Both deliver a body-shaking orgasm.
There are also prostate stimulators that hit both your internal and external prostate. That’s right fellas, double the bum fun! External massagers target your perineum (the area between your anus and scrotum), which is sometimes affectionately referred to as the taint.
Health Benefits of Prostate Massage
As if mind numbing orgasms weren’t enough - prostate massage actually offers some pretty awesome health benefits. Orgasms, in general, are good for your physical and mental health. Climaxing not only works your muscles but it makes sure your muscles are working! When you reach orgasm, your brain releases feel-good chemicals known as endorphins. Endorphins are responsible for feelings of happiness and relaxation.
But prostate stimulation offers specific benefits for men. An enlarged prostate is very common in men but can cause medical complications. This is why it’s recommended that men over the age of 40 get their prostate checked regularly. Prostate massage and milking helps release built-up fluids that can cause swelling and discomfort. For anyone dealing with an enlarged prostate, regular massage can help alleviate pain and pressure.
Prostate Massage for Beginners
Now that we’ve covered the basics of prostate stimulation, massagers, and stimulators, let’s discuss a few more pointers.
Tips for Using a Prostate Massager
One of the best things about a vibrating prostate massager is that you can use it externally before ever exploring on the inside. Start by stroking or even tapping your perineum from the outside (remember, this the area between your scrotum and rectum). Press against it while masturbating, varying the pressure and intensity.
The shape of the prostate stimulator you choose is also important. You might notice that most massagers have wings or arms at the base. Not only are these for you to hold onto but they’re actually there for safety reasons. Your sphincter muscle is pretty powerful and the last thing you want is for your body to take more of the toy in than you bargained for - and not give it back! That’s right, these arms prevent toys from getting lost inside your bum - yikes!
Who Can Enjoy Prostate Massagers?
This might seem like an obvious answer, but anyone! Sure, people with prostates will obviously benefit more from these sleek and sexy toys, but they’re fun for anyone with an anal opening that needs penetrating. In terms of prostate stimulation, cisgender males and anyone born with a penis are the best candidates.
You can stimulate your prostate alone or with a partner. If you relinquish control to someone else, make sure you’ve established a deep level of trust. Anal penetration of any kind can easily result in injury due to how thin and sensitive the rectal wall is. Make sure your partner uses plenty of lubricant and goes slow. Speak up if you feel any discomfort or pain. Pain is a sure sign that something’s wrong and you need to back off. Be sure to communicate throughout the entire experience, which shouldn’t be hard since dirty talk is a huge turn on for most people.
For all the straight guys out there, this ones for you. No, using a prostate massager (or asking your woman to use it on you) doesn’t make you gay. Prostate stimulation and anal play have zero to do with your sexual preferences and all to do with your pleasure. If it feels good and you and your partner are comfortable with it, the more power to ya! Enjoying p-spot stimulation simply means you’ve discovered a new way to get-off. We repeat, it has nothing to do with your sexuality.
To Lube or Not to Lube…
...this isn’t even a question! Lube is a MUST for anal play and even more important for prostate stimulation. Lube will make penetration easier while also increasing your pleasure. Avoid numbing lubes which could mask your body’s natural signs to slow down. If you’re using a silicone prostate massager of prostate stimulator, stick with water-based lubricants. Glass, metal, or plastic toys are compatible with silicone lube which is often thicker and longer lasting. Another pro tip: when you think you’ve used enough lube, you probably need more!
P-Spot Stimulation Feels Different for Everyone
No two people experience the same level of orgasms, whether it’s through vaginal intercourse, oral sex, or prostate stimulation. That means we can’t tell you exactly what a prostate orgasm will feel like or how many times you’ll cum. Sure, multiple orgasms are possible at the hands of a prostate massager, but there’s no guarantee you’ll be one of the lucky men that experiences this. Many men describe prostate orgasms as overwhelming and believe they experience more than one climax per session. Just remember, multiple orgasms in men don’t mean that you’ll ejaculate each time. You may experience a second orgasm without any physical or visual release.
Keep It Clean
The biggest worry people have when it comes to backdoor play is getting an unexpected surprise. There’s no way to guarantee that things won’t get messy when you get down and dirty with prostate stimulation, but there are a few things you can do to prepare. Start by taking a relaxing shower or bath. This will not only help you relax but leave you feeling squeaky clean. In life (and in anal play), shit happens. If you’re alone or with the right person, it won’t matter much but if the idea completely freaks you out you could try an enema to clean out your system beforehand. You can also check out this guide on the best diet for gay bottoms. (Even if you’re not gay, this article offers some pretty useful tips on what to eat and what to avoid before exploring your backdoor).
Explore Different Kinds of Prostate Massagers
Like most sex toys, prostate massagers come in all sizes, shapes, designs, and materials. The best prostate massager for you fits both your body and your needs. You’ll need plenty of practice and experimentation to find the best fit. Choose a prostate stimulator that is sleek and nonporous for easy clean-up. Start with external stimulation and work your way up to full insertion. Remember, the journey to prostate stimulation is half the fun. Don’t rush it. Have fun experimenting and bring your partner in on the fun, too. Looking for more kinky fetishes to explore? Check out this article for some naughty suggestions.