15 Most Popular and Obscure Gay Kinks and Fetishes
Here we’re going to uncover some of the most taboo, sometimes strange, but always intriguing gay kinks and fetishes. This one’s for all the gay men out there looking to explore unique and nontraditional forms of sex play. So, pull up a chair, grab your lube, and let’s get into it.
What Are Kinks and Fetishes?
Often used interchangeably, there’s actually a difference between kinks and fetishes.
A kink is something that causes sexual arousal outside of the conventional norm. A fetish is sexual arousal to an object or sex act that is necessary for an individual to achieve orgasm.
So, basically, a kink is something that turns you on but might be considered a little odd. A fetish, on the other hand, is something you NEED to get off.
This article will cover both kinks and fetishes that are common among the gay community.
Most Popular (but sometimes obscure) Gay Kinks and Fetishes
Perhaps you’ve tried some of the more basic kinks and fetishes like having sex in public (voyeurism) or edging (orgasm control). But now you’re ready to step-up your game and delve into something a little more intense and a lot more satisfying.
Here are a few suggestions to get you started on your journey toward deeper (pun intended) sexual exploration and experimentation.
1. Used Underwear
There’s something super hot about backless underwear, jockstraps, and thongs that perfectly showcase your package. But this fetish involves sexual arousal over someone else’s sexy underwear -- and not just the look of it. Some gay men get-off on the smell and sight of used underwear.
This fetish is actually quite popular in many gay circles including porn stars, escorts, and other sex figures. In fact, some top-name celebrities actually make money off selling their used underwear to naughty kinksters who want a sniff of their dirty drawers.
2. Leather and Rubber
Leather -- the quintessential fabric of sex. How many times have you seen a man dressed head to toe in tight, shiny leather and almost come in your pants? Well, you’re clearly not alone. Leather symbolizes dominance and has been a staple of gay culture for several decades. The famous 1970s drawing of two leather-clad bikers in form-fitting leather embracing one another pretty much sealed the deal.
Today, there are actually entire fairs and conventions dedicated to this fetish. From leather thongs and assless pants to jockstraps and harnesses, it’s all tight, it’s all hot, and it’s all sure to get you off. Leather fetishes are also synonymous with BDSM and bondage.
But let’s not forget about the rubber! No, we aren’t talking about condoms but you need those too. Some people prefer the stretch and flexibility of rubber over leather or a combination of the two.
3. Uniforms
Ya gotta love a man in uniform. Police officers, firefighters, doctors, and servicemen -- yes, yes, and YES! There’s something undeniably sexy about the confidence and authority of a man in uniform.
Most of society is raised to view these positions as ones of great respect. Over time, these figures quickly became sex symbols and soon morphed into popular stripper and role-playing costumes. Some guys just can’t help but want to relinquish complete control to a strong, viral man in tight uniform pants.
4. Sports Gear
Let’s face it, we’ve all fantasized about taking the star quarterback behind the bleachers and going down on him. Similar to uniforms, sports gear is a huge turn-on for many gay men and a common fetish.
There’s something erotic and intoxicating about the sporting environment from locker room showers to sweaty muscles, dirt, and even the sharp sound of the whistle. And let’s not forget about all that contact, tackling, and team huddles. The uniforms only add to the appeal. Tight pants, jockstraps, shoulder pads, and helmets.
Some gay guys also get-off on the idea of turning a straight athlete who’s the symbol of masculinity to the gay side. Can you blame them? We love a good challenge!
5. Guns and Knives
Take a darker turn and we arrive at a more obscure fetish of guns and knives. Similar to the uniform fetish, sexual arousal to these weapons is closely connected to feelings of control, power, and authority.
There are countless kidnapper or burglar scenarios to engage in where one partner demands sexual favors while holding a weapon to the other person’s head or neck. Yes, we realize this sounds a bit dark and dangerous -- because it is! And that’s part of the appeal. With any sinister fetish, there’s risk involved and loaded weapons should NEVER be used.
But the power and excitement of a gun-wielding “kidnapper” isn’t the only reason these items make our fetish list. The shape of these instruments of power is eerily similar to that of a strong, thick cock. In fact, some men actually get off on imitating oral sex with the barrel of a gun (we don’t suggest this with a knife for obvious reasons).
6. Muscles
Muscles are sexy. Duh! This isn’t really a farfetched fetish or kink. In fact, Muscle Beach in Venice, California is designed specifically for muscle-bound fitness enthusiasts to parade around in skimpy attire, flaunting their muscles and causing onlookers to swoon.
Sthenolagnia is the arousal for displays of strength and large muscles. If you get turned on by the sight and feel of bulging biceps, popping veins, and obscenely large neck muscles, this may be your not-so-secret fetish. The idea of being manhandled by a “real” man strong enough to have his way with you and toss you around the bedroom (lovingly, of course), is a huge turn-on for many guys.
7. Beards or Facial Hair
There’s nothing quite as manly or sexy as a guy with a beard. There’s just something masculine about a man with facial hair. He looks rough, ready, and down to get nasty! Body hair, in general, is a common gay fetish and is considered a prominent sex symbol.
On the flip side, some guys get off on shaving tools, razors, and the act of shaving someone else’s body hair (or their own). While shaving is often viewed as a nonsexual (if not mundane) self-maintenance practice, some gay men find it satisfying and arousing. Because this is a sexual activity more than an object-infatuation, you might consider it more of a kink. However, the sexual attraction to razors and buzzers falls under the category of fetish. The vibration of the buzzer and the feeling of it running against their skin is a source of sexual pleasure for many guys. So, if your boyfriend is getting his haircut more often than normal, you may want to ask what’s up?
8. Pig Play
What fetish list would be complete without mentioning bodily fluids and functions? While some of us prefer to leave these things for the bathroom, others are more than happy to bring them front and center in the bedroom.
Pig play is a term that refers to sexual activity geared towards bodily fluids like sweat, ejaculate, spit, urine, and, yes, #2. Spit and urine are two of the most popular fetish fluids involved in pig play.
Paraphilia, commonly referred to as “golden showers”, describes the sexual arousal to urine -- your own and others. Also known as piss play, some gay guys love peeing on their partners as a sign of humiliation. Others prefer being peed on or in some cases, ingesting their partner’s urine. Say, “Ah”!
Spitting on hands and cocks is another popular practice for adding extra lube. Plus, there’s something hot and animalistic about using your own saliva as lube. Some men take this fetish one step further and are sexually aroused by being spit on, spitting on others, and even consuming saliva.
9. Daddies and Twinks
You’ve heard of sugar daddies. Well, the daddies and twinks fetish is all about an older, experienced man and his young, petite (sometimes feminine), boy toy.
It’s no surprise that older guys are attracted to young, innocent, and pure boys who they can break-in and mold into their perfect sex slaves. So, what’s in it for the young guys? They get to bang an older man who’s experienced and often spoils them both in and out of the bedroom.
In this fetish scenario, the daddy calls the shot and the submissive twink obeys. Twinks enjoy being told what to do and how to do it. Daddies call the shots and control most situations. It’s common for kinksters that are into BDSM but it’s also a stand-alone fetish that anyone can explore!
10. Cruising
No, we’re not talking about taking a cruise up the coast in your Wrangler -- although this fetish does involve driving or walking around in search of a random sex partner. Cruising involves anonymous, promiscuous, and casual sex with strangers -- sometimes in public spaces. Some guys go out to actively cruise an area while others are constantly on the prowl.
Men cruise for partners at bars, clubs, or areas known as cruising grounds. The internet is another popular forum for finding one-night stands and casual sex partners. There’s a mutual understanding among both partners that the exchange is purely about sex and nothing more.
11. Anonymous Sex
Men in the gay community are infamous for getting off on the thrill of random hook-ups. No names, no numbers, just heart (and ass) pounding sex. Part of the thrill is the adrenaline rush that comes with having sex with a stranger. Others take it to the extreme and engage in gloryhole fun, patronize bathhouses, or even fuck at highway rest stops (a popular choice).
Similar to sex clubs, gay bathhouses are a communal space (sometimes referred to as “the saunas”, “the tubs”, or “the baths”), where men take steam baths and have sex with random strangers. Gloryholes are another popular way for gay men to indulge in their anonymous sex fantasies. Gloryholes allow men to either engage in sexual activity through a hole in a wall or partition without knowing much about the man on the other side. Guys can indulge in oral or anal sex through these holes or simply observe one another while masturbating. It all depends on your level of kink and promiscuity.
12. Fisting and Gaping
When a single cock or dildo just isn’t enough, some gay men want an entire hand, fist, or other large object jammed up their ass. (Hamster, anyone?) This fetish is common among gay men who’ve had plenty of anal sex and worked their way up to comfortably accepting large objects in their bum.
After inserting an oversized fist, toy, or another random object into the ass (with plenty of lube), the object is removed and the asshole is left gaping, sometimes so wide that the other person can actually see inside! This fetish isn’t for the faint of heart and should only be tried by a receiver who is experienced in fist-play. Also, be smart about the objects you use to avoid injury.
13. Barebacking
Condoms should be a staple of any gay sexual exchange to avoid contracting or transmitting STDs. However, nothing feels quite as good as sex without a condom. Barebacking is a common fetish in the gay community and simply put, involves anal sex without a condom. This fetish combines the raw feeling of skin-on-skin contact with the danger and thrill of unprotected sex.
The fact that unprotected anal sex is considered by some as dangerous or unsafe, is actually the attraction for most guys who indulge in this fetish. There’s also something intimate about the feeling of sex without a condom, making barebacking common among kinky couples as well.
14. Gangbanging
What’s better than sex with one hot guy? Sex with A LOT of hot guys! You’ve likely seen gangbanging porn videos that involve one guy taking on multiple men, one after another or some at the same time (one cock in their ass and another one -- or two -- in their mouth).
For some guys, the idea of being manhandled and willingly abused by multiple men is a dream come true (literally). Some extreme kinksters engage in gangbangs without protection to incorporate their barebacking fetish into this scenario. Gangbanging might also involve anonymous or random dudes, which is another form of cruising.
15. Bears
Lions, and tigers, and bears, oh my! We aren’t in Kansas anymore, friends. This fetish is all about the attraction and appeal of big, hairy men. Some guys just can’t get enough of hairy dudes and are turned on by the pure rugged, masculinity they project.
There’s actually an entire community that surrounds this bear culture. Popularized in the 1970s, hair men of all shapes and sizes came together to share and indulge in this fetish. In fact, other names were given to smaller, younger men. Slim guys are known as otters, young men are referred to as cubs and wolves are men of medium stature. A bear without hair is known as a manatee.
Broaden Your Sexual Horizons With These Gay Fetishes and Kinks
Are you looking to switch things up, try something new, and get a little kinkier? These gay fetishes and kinks can help take your sex game to the next level.
As always, practice safe sex within yours and your sex partner’s comfort levels. Don’t be afraid to dabble in the forbidden, strange, or unexplored. That’s where you’ll uncover some of the best sexual experiences of your life!
